Tales From the Gym – Sartorial Subterfuge Takes a Violent Turn

March 30th, 2007

I spotted the wig again today – the brunette waist length wig with broad vertical stripes of maroon. It was hanging on a hook outside of a shower stall, again. No one was in the shower, and there were no hairless people in sight. The truly peculiar thing, though, is that the wig was there when I arrived at the gym, and still there when I left two hours later. Now, either the owner of the wig got sucked into the drainpipe in the shower… or the dimensional portal has opened up again and my gym has become some kind of battle ground where scalps are collected and hung up amongst the towels in the shower room.

Wikipedia tells me that the Visigoths were avid ninth-century scalpers; perhaps the Visigoths are here to chase the Vikings from a few weeks ago out of the sauna? How else, besides a TARDIS, would the Visigoths and the Vikings have an opportunity to battle each other?

It sort of makes me think of fantasy baseball leagues, where players can pit the 1984 incarnation of one team against the 2001 version of another team – thus capturing both at their highest moments of glory in the way that only the time-defiant can do.

Maybe whoever parked the TARDIS in my sauna is playing fantasy “Early Medieval Epic Battles.” “You know what would be soooo cool? If we could get the Visigoths from when they were sacking the Roman Empire in the fifth-century, and make them fight the ninth-century Vikings… and… and… since Scandanavia and Rome are too far apart, we’ll have them fight in Los Angeles, 2007!”

Entry Filed under: Tales From the Gym

Leave a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Trackback this post  |  Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed